Let me paint a picture for you. I had it all planned in my head. I decided to take the girls to Brookfield Zoo for the day. I enjoy when they bring friends along as they normally all police each other and I am just a sheep herder. One of Mia’s friends from school was able to go with which made it that much more special.

I got my workout in at the Centegra. My endorphins were kicking and I had dreams of a beautiful day….until it happened. Something that I will probably never forget. It will scar me for life and possible all generations of children for the next millennia. All it took was one word that completely derailed that amazing trip. The word that most men fear and all women hate. Well not that word but one just as bad. Oh F*CK!
How could this happen? How could this be? Did I say it? Is there anything I could have done to make this day start over?

We enjoyed a lunch before departing which probably set me in a relaxed mindset and definitely did not prepare me for what was to come. We left with 6 people in the mini-van set for our final destination of Brookfield Zoo. We made it about a mile when suddenly out of the blue the following conversation took place:

Van Conversation

Milana: Daddy.
Daddy (me): Yes honey?
Milana: How do you pronounce F – * – C – K?
Daddy: (Righting the car off the median and almost striking a tree and another vehicle) What did you just say?
Milana: How do you pronounce F – * – C – K? Daddy, what does it mean?

Being a good father, I immediately pulled the mini-van over. I took her out of the vehicle and walked her to the tree of knowledge which just so happened to be right there at the intersection. I decided that this would be a perfect to provide Milana a through understanding of the word. First, I let her know that it could take on many different forms. The word could be not only a verb but also a noun, an adjective or a variety other forms depending on the context. I then told her that when she got angry at another motorist that she could stick up her middle finger at that person and tell them to F*CK OFF! Lastly, I told her it was when a man and a woman…….STOP…Kidding her people. If you truly think that I told my daughter this, I would hopefully think you would see me as a failure.

Knowing that I have said this word on occasion probably louder than I probably should have, I decided not to ask her where she picked up this word. I was fearful that she would say….”Well daddy dearest, I heard this same word come from your filthy mouth on several occasions and just wanted clarification for my own educational pursuits”. My next thought is it had to be Mary….That’s it….. she probably let it slip and it was not my fault at all. Nah that could not be it.

I was starting to scramble her for a response. Instead of investigating this further, I took an approach that has been passed on generation to generation….The Don’t Do What I Do Method. I told her that it was ONLY an adult word and that I did not want her using it again. It was a very bad word that can hurt people’s feeling very easily and should not be used by her until she became an adult. She said she understood and I think I will have deal with this a later date but at least for now….I stopped the behavior.

Do you have any suggestions for a better way of handling the use of curse words? I would be open up to suggestions….Just leave me a shout out below.