What The Hell Was I Thinking???

Apr 11, 2018 | Uncategorized

I do not think it comes as a surprise that I enjoy being around the girls.  As the girls were born, I thought of the day that they would be the best of friends.  The day that there would be harmony in the house.  The day that there would be laughter and good conversation in all four corners of the house.  WHAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING?

Maybe I had false hopes and dreams since me and my older brother argued quite a bit….but girls….are they not better?  Um NOPE!  That dumb ass poem of What Girls are Made of:

Sugar and spice
and everything nice
that’s what little girls are made of

Sunshine and rainbows
and ribbons for hair bows
that’s what little girls are made of

Tea parties, laces
and baby doll faces
that’s what little girls are made of

I think someone was hitting the crack pipe or never saw how these girls act!  What drives me nuttier than a jay bird is that they have pulled the wool over so many people’s eyes.  “Oh my goodness, I’d take Milana right now”; “Oh Bella is so sweet”; “Mia is such a well behaved girl”.  Are you kidding me?  What do I need to do to get people to realize that I think I need to call in some heavy hitters to conduct the next exorcism.  The only reason I have not done it yet is that I do not do well around green vomit…..well vomit in general; color will most likely not make a difference.  As I told my good CPR Ninjas from Zion….I’m a sympathetic “vomitter”.  If you barf on me…It’s a natural reaction (and maybe revenge) that I’m gonna hork all over you.  It might not be green but damn it I’ll go projectile on you!

ANYWHO…I digress.  Getting back to these “wonderful little angels”.  So what do we argue about in the Chalet?  Oh I don’t know…..

“Daddy, Mia took the last orange”

“Daddy, Milana is looking at me….and I don’t like it”

“Daddy, Bella is copying me”

All three in Unison, “I don’t want to watch [insert movie]”.  NO ONE CAN AGREE HERE.

{Insert Whiny Voice} – {Insert Latest Tattling Issue}

{Insert Crying} {Insert Complaint}

Did I do this to my parents when I was a kid?  I do not remember being this micro with my complaints about my brother.  Was he a pain in the ass at times….well yes but I’m sure I was not a peach all the time (only 99% – Ask Mary she’ll confirm this :)~~~

What have I tried to fix the behavior?  We have done the time out thing….Um fail.  We have taken things away.  That works for about 2 mins and then they forget about it.  Take away special treats….again they forget about it.  The one that I like the most is that they have to do a time out followed by giving the other “offender” a hug and tell them why they love them.  Boy does that piss them off but it sure gives the parents a giggle or two.

So I read an article that says that you need to write down the rules and have the kids agree to them ahead of time (instead of wanting to just ship them off to the gypsies).  This woman that wrote the article says that by doing this all problems have ceased.  I’m not buying it….or maybe my girls are just aliens that don’t comply with normal behavior.

Here are the rules from her:

  1.  In a conflict, no hurting (hitting, kicking, pinching, spitting) is ever allowed.  If this happens, the consequence is no screen time for a week.
  2. No name-calling or personal insults about someone’s appearance..  Consequence same as #1
  3. If anyone is fighting over a toy, the toy gets a time out.  No questions asked.
  4. Any person who demands to be first will go last.
  5. Whatever is borrowed must be returned.  If it isn’t, the consequence is that the borrower must choose an item from their sibling’s room to replace the missing one.

Is this the Holy Grail that I have been searching for?  Can the chalet become a bastion of peace, love and tranquility?  Well I will try anything to try to make it more palatable on the bad days.  What do you do to make things defuse in your house?  Let us know below.

Oh and would you just do it already and like the Fire Dads Facebook page?  Geez what do I need to do, promise that I’ll come by and do a load of laundry?  I will show up in my Borat outfit….Get that one out of your head….and like us already!

I’ll dress up and do your laundry if you like our Facebook Page!

https://www.realsimple.com/work-life/family/kids-parenting/stop-sibling-fights